the hardest..

she laid in the world she used to be comfortable.. but everything changed in a second..
she had suffered but no one knows.. all the arrows turn their point of view on her..
at first she struggle for herself..at last she gives up..
she's not allow to be angry on things she angry..
she's not allow to choose not to talk when she feels like not to speak..
she's not allow to do what she want to do..
all the restriction fell on her.. she was hard..
but the one and only...had not understand her.. disappointment fills the air..
everything become so hard for her..
not knowing how to face the changes in her life..
she cried for help.. but no one hears..
she.. the best friend of herself.. no one she could trust..
but with faith.. she knows god would help her up..
she tell god.. everything is in His hand.. she committed herself to HIM..
friendship, relationship, and kinship... she had only one of three "-ship"
but never mind she said.. everything is going to be alright..

something i need to do....

2 months passed.. time really flew just like that..
troubles come "un-invitely" during this period.. and i still can't get rid of it..
i got fed up..
i shout, scream, cry, and keep on praticing till im tired..
all i have done to make myself numb in sadness..
till one day..
i decided.. to rest in the arm of an angel..
to rest for my future path..
therefore, im not coming back until the day i ready to take this matter seriously..
god bless.. at last

something..

it is hard to get to know people well..
but it is harder than to get people to know you well..
and what is to believe, what is not?

i am sad when no one believe me and tell me lies..
something that don't have to explain to make it true or else it is a lie..
because it is hurt when i found out that it's a lie..

i rather except the truth that hurts than telling me a lie to avoid me from getting hurt..
that's not trying to save me and prevent me from hurt..
that's not the way i could tell..
please stop fooling around and make me a moron..

bon??pas mal??

hmmm.. terrible cny for me !!
being sick since the 1st day of cny..
i started to cough at night.. yet the next day..
flu is coming.. and then the 3rd day.. follow up by snizzy nose~
guess they coming to take ang pao from me??
hahhaha.. anyway they are paying visit on chinese new year~!!
yeay??? happy to year to them anyway!!

oh gosh..
a bit bored cos being put out the plane by friends.. good then..
think on the positive way..
maybe its better for me to have a rest!!
thank you then~!!!

hahazz
anyway.. tonight having dinner with my cg members here!!
happy new year to all!!

still got 2 more days left!!
waiting for ya~!!

bonne annee chinois!!

yay.. happy chinese new year!!!
but aint feel that happy..
cos i really feel my spiritual life just like the economic growth~!
having my demand curve downward slopping since new year..
i wish i could get back to my life over there..
help me lord~

really bored up here in the room!!